Nervous
by sunandsteel
Summary: “Well,” he said, quite matter-of-factly. “I don’t know about you, but that was the best date I’ve ever been on.” SiriusRemus.


Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

Remus Lupin was bored. It was the middle of summer; he had just graduated Hogwarts and was so fed up he found himself wishing he could go back. It wasn't that he _enjoyed_ school (well actually, he did come to think of it), but it was more the fact that he enjoyed having his friends (Friends! Even after seven years, that still felt foreign to him) constantly around him. He lived on a farm with his parents in the back-end of nowhere (he had yet to find a flat to live in), and felt completely cut off from civilization. It wasn't until he got a phone call from one of his _friends_ that his summer got a bit more interesting.

He was used to using the phone. His mother was a muggle; therefore his house was a mixture of things magical and non. It was the fact that one of his best friends Sirius Black, a pure-blood wizard and someone who had never taken muggle studies in his whole life was ringing him that was making him confused.

The conversation had started out relatively normal; Remus asked Sirius if he had found any jobs yet to which Sirius replied, "Why would I need a job?" It was when Remus was just about to hang up that Sirius finally said what he had phoned for in the first place.

"Oi, Remus, what are you doing tomorrow night?" His voice sounded strange, Remus wondered if he had a cold, or hay fever or something.

"Er..nothing," Remus replied; because it was true. "Why, are we all going to meet up or something?"

Sirius cleared his throat nervously (since when did Sirius get nervous?, Remus thought) and replied, "Well..no. I was thinking we could do something. You know, the two of us."

"Of course we can, it's not like you have to even ask me." Remus said, feeling slightly confused. Why was Sirius making such a big deal about them doing something together? Usually he'd just floo to his house and drag him somewhere. This felt..different. He couldn't figure out why.

"Yeah I know," he sounded a bit defensive, which was weird. "I just wanted to ask, that's all. Anyway, I thought we could go and see a movie or something. Have you ever been? They're bloody brilliant if you ask me. James' dad took us a couple of weeks ago; it's the coolest thing I've ever seen!'

Ah. There was the Sirius Remus had come to know and love (Love? Where did that come from?) Remus replied that he'd love (there was that word again) to go to the cinema, and that Sirius could pick the movie. They arranged to meet at the Leaky Cauldron the next day, and hung up.

It was strange. Why couldn't James and Peter come to the cinema with them? It wasn't as if neither of them wouldn't want to go. Remus went back to his book (that he'd already read _three_ times since June) and pushed it to the back of his mind.

* * *

It annoyed him the rest of the morning. He couldn't figure out what was different about it. Maybe it was the fact that Sirius had seemed distracted on the phone, almost nervous in Remus' mind. But Sirius Black never got nervous. He debated it over and over in his mind, until he felt the need to talk to someone. He flooed himself to James' new flat on a whim.

James was sitting with Lily on the sofa (he had finally managed to convince her he wasn't completely horrible), his head in her lap while she played with his hair. He sat in the armchair next to them, not sure what to even say. "Oh, Sirius asked me to go to the cinema tomorrow and his voice was different." It sounded ridiculous even in his head. However, he didn't even have to bring it up as Lily asked him if he had any plans for tomorrow.

"Well, Sirius asked me to go the cinema, so.." He didn't understand why he'd said 'Sirius asked'. Usually he would've just said 'Sirius and I are going'. Why was he making such a big deal out of nothing?

"Oh Sirius asked you, did he?" Lily asked, with a strange gleam in her eye. "That's a bit odd don't you think?" James eyed her suspiciously.

Remus suddenly felt as if he was being scrutinized. He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "Not really.." he was muttering, he couldn't even look at Lily. Why was he being so ridiculous? "We do things together all the time.."

"You mean you, Sirius, James and _Peter_ do things together all the time," Lily stated. "You never do things alone."

Now that he thought about it, he realised she was right. Sirius _may_ have flooed to his house and dragged him somewhere, but it was only to meet James and Peter. He felt a strange feeling in his stomach while he adjusted to this revelation.

"Just _what_ are you insinuating Lily Evans?" James asked, quirking an eyebrow at her.

"Well.." Lily said, smirking to herself "I think Sirius asked little Remus here out on a _date._"

"_Excuse _me?!" Remus spluttered, completely shocked that Lily would even _say_ such a thing, let alone think it. "Are we thinking of the same Sirius Black here? Hogwarts Ladies Man, different woman every month Sirius Black?"

Lily scoffed. "Oh please, he stopped that in _fifth_ year Remus, fifth year! I think he finally came to terms with his sexuality."

His head was reeling. Lily Evans had actually gone completely insane. "Are you bloody mad? James, I think you need to take your girlfriend to St. Mungos."

James had been quietly contemplating everything Lily had said, and watching Remus' outbursts with slight amusement. "I don't know.." he started, to which Remus began spluttering again. "He never talks about girls anymore. And he _had_ been paying you loads of attention in seventh year."

"That's because we're friends!" Remus protested. "This is ridiculous - you're all bloody…this is…I can't even - blah!" He flooed home in an outrage, completely shocked and horrified by his friends words and ideas. Lily actually believed that Sirius had asked him on a _date_. Which technically meant that he _fancied_ him. And to top it all off, James kind of sort of agreed with her! Remus' mind was reeling. His stomach felt like it was clenched up in tight knots and he was finding it difficult to breathe.

He was secretly trying to convince himself that it was because he was outraged at his friends ideas, and not intrigued and sort of excited.

* * *

The evening of the date (_it's not a bloody date! _He reminded himself) arrived far too fast for Remus' liking, and he found himself waiting at the Leaky Cauldron feeling strangely nervous. As they were venturing to muggle London, he was wearing jeans, a pair of trainers and a Beatles t-shirt that Lily had bought him for Christmas. He had a jacket on over it, as he always seemed to find himself cold. After what felt like an _eternity_ (but in reality was probably less than 5 minutes), Sirius arrived.

He was wearing his biker boots (as per usual), black jeans, a leather jacket and a Led Zeppelin t-shirt he had bought himself when he, James, Remus and Peter had gone to see them on tour a while ago. Seeing it reminded Remus of that night; being pushed up against a sweaty Sirius in the middle of a crowd. He remembered feeling uncomfortable the whole night - he had put it down to being surrounded by so many people - but now with Lily and James' speculation (and the strange knots in his stomach) he wasn't entirely certain.

They talked about everything and nothing; mostly what they were planning to do once they got settled and found their own flats (Sirius was still living at the Potters'). Although he felt comfortable (it was still Sirius, after all) he still felt a strange feeling in his stomach, like something was churning inside it; even though he had barely eaten all day. He could feel Sirius looking at him; he must have been acting strangely.

The movie was interesting, to say the least. Remus had seen movies before of course; but only on the television they had at home. The cinema was a whole new experience for him, he was glad Sirius had dragged him there (although he hadn't really dragged him, he had _asked _). Of course he couldn't help but notice just how _close_ you were to someone when you sat beside them; as every time Sirius moved to reach his drink or sweets his arm would graze his slightly. He felt a chill go through him each time, which only further confused his mind as Lily and James' words reverberated in his brain.

* * *

They decided to walk around for a while before returning to the Leaky Cauldron as Sirius claimed he wanted to take in all of muggle London. Remus was too nervous (and slightly confused with these new-found nerves) to suggest otherwise, so they walked slowly and quietly around the streets, while Sirius pointed out things that confused him ("Zebra crossing? I can't see any Zebra's near it.") and Remus trying his best to explain them. Slowly but surely they managed to reach a comfortable silence, until Sirius broke it.

"Well," he said, quite matter-of-factly. "I don't know about you, but that was the best date I've ever been on."

Remus immediately stopped walking. He felt himself shaking with nerves. Lily had been right, it _was_ a date. Oh god. He thought his heart was going to burst through his ribcage. "You mean -" he asked, (rather breathlessly he noted; damn you hormones!) "You mean, this was a date?"

Sirius looked at him fondly, a smirk forming at the corner of his mouth. Remus felt, rather than saw him lean in closer towards him. "Of course. What did you think it was?"

The knots in his stomach were back. On the one hand, he felt ridiculously stupid and actually kind of embarrassed. On the other hand, this meant that Sirius Black, best friend for seven years and sex _god_ (he reckoned, and, if he was being honest, secretly kind of hoped), fancied him! He could feel himself burning up, even though they were outside. (_So much for always being cold, _he thought) He wondered how it would look if he suddenly took off his jacket. He realised he hadn't said anything in about a minute, and Sirius was starting to look a bit nervous.

"Oh. Well," he began. His voice sounded strangled weird; as if it didn't really belong to him. "I wasn't sure really. I mean - we haven't even kissed or anything.." Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit. Why did he say that? Why did he bloody say that? Oh god.

Sirius was grinning like a bloody Cheshire cat (which was ironic, Remus thought, considering his animagus form) and staring at Remus with one of those infamous Sirius Black looks that he usually got when he knew was going to do something that was sort of, almost definitely naughty.

"Remus Lupin.." he teased, eyebrows raised and grin at full volume. "are you asking me to kiss you?"

He couldn't breathe. He was going to faint like a stupid girl in the middle of the stupid street and Sirius would have to give him mouth to mouth. Although now that he thought about it that didn't sound so bad..

"Er, well. Maybe.." he said (more like whispered, stupid bloody voice) "I mean, only if you want to."

Sirius's face had taken on a predatory look. His eyes darkened (with lust? Remus wondered), and he looked Remus up and down. _Like I'm a piece of bloody meat_, Remus thought, although for some strange reason he felt oddly excited by it.

He was staring directly at Remus' mouth. His own mouth was slightly parted and he looked like he was struggling to control his breathing. "Of course I bloody want to." His voice had changed too; albeit it was more husky and sexy than high and girly.

Remus' stomach was doing flip flops (another girly thing, he thought ridiculously - it was clear who was the girl in this relationship); Sirius Black was about to kiss him and he felt like he was going to actually die from excitement and nerves and bloody hell, he was about to kiss a _boy _(he wondered if it would be any different), and Sirius was moving closer and closer and he could see his eyelashes now, and all of a sudden Sirius' lips were on his and it was all a frenzied mesh of lips and tongues and moaning (did he moan? He definitely didn't moan) and Jesus, he could do this forever.

When they finally came up for air (Remus felt inexplicably lost); Sirius rested his forehead on top of Remus' and grinned. He places his hands on Remus' sides (even under his clothes he felt as if his skin was on fire) and gave them a squeeze.

"I've wanted to do that for ages" he muttered, pulling Remus close to him.

"Does this mean you're my boyfriend now?" Remus blurted, like an idiot. Sirius pulled his head back laughing and said,

"God Remus, don't be so gay." But by the way that he put his arm around Remus' shoulders and pulled him closely while they continued to walk home made Remus think that yeah, he probably was.


End file.
